Saturday, December 12, 2009

That Poor Antipsychotic

As the health care reform debate rages on, I often wonder how mental health treatment will change. Poor children are among the most vulnerable in our society. Yesterday, the New York Times published an article citing that children on Medicaid were found to be prescribed anti-psychotic drugs, at a rate of four to one when compared to their middle-class counterpart. Now, I can get on a soapbox rant, but I think it's more constructive to ask, why is it that convenience and the employment of cost-cutting measures trump appropriate mental health treatment?

Why is this happening?
Is it that poor families do not know or do not care to advocate for their children? Is it that the doctors just want to minimize paperwork and medicate a problem to oblivion? Can you imagine if the reverse were true? The fanfare and protest would be never ending!

According to the New York Times, these children are less likely to receive family counseling or psychotherapy since Medicaid pays more for medication than for counseling session and poor families are time-challenged with attending counseling or therapy sessions, if that service is available. However, I think it's more than that. I think it comes back to the stigma of mental illness and a lack of understanding of how talk therapy can help.

The data shows that these antipsychotics are given even when these children don't need them. But you have to realize that this is a rational choice for a poor and probably poorly educated family. We live in a society that allows for commercials to run non-stop to fix your CLPD (what ever that is), your arthritis, your asthma, your left nut on lockdown, your flaccid penis and your left twitching eye. In this insane world then, it makes perfect sense to correct rebellious behavior with a small blue or red pill. In a family constantly on the perilous edge of survival it is the easy way out. It makes sense.

Even the article admits that "it is often a pediatrician or family doctor who prescribes an antipsychotic to a Medicaid patient — whether because the parent wants it or the doctor believes there are few other options." Granted, the drugs are typically cheaper than long-term therapy. Who really wants to dig deep into the abandonment, alcoholism, abuse, oppression, molestation, or other dysfunctional etc. remnants these families are recycling? It's so much easier to have Medicaid pay $7.9 billion than attend years of dynamic therapy or 20 sessions of directed cognitive behavioral therapy. Even the experts agree "that some characteristics of the Medicaid population may contribute to psychological problems or psychiatric disorders."

Oh, really??
According to the article, "studies have found that children in low-income families may have a higher rate of mental health problems — perhaps two to one — compared with children in better-off families. But that still does not explain the four-to-one disparity in prescribing antipsychotics." Now, I have a bone to pick with that finding. Based on my empirical experience, better-off families are just as screwed up. They just learn to hide it better. A child's perceived abandonment by a parent is still real whether it's because of absence that came about through overwork or through disappearance.

Isn't it criminal?
"The data also indicates that poorer children are more likely to receive antipsychotics for less serious conditions than would typically prompt a prescription for a middle-class child." While the experts do not have clear evidence to form an opinion on whether or not children on Medicaid were being overtreated, where the hell is the Food and Drug Administration on this issue? To me there is something seriously wrong with this picture. "Medicaid children were more likely than those with private insurance to be given the drugs for off-label uses like A.D.H.D. and conduct disorders. The privately insured children, in turn, were more likely than their Medicaid counterparts to receive the drugs for F.D.A.-approved uses like bipolar disorder."

Again, this is about properly educating poor families about what it means to have a mental illness, what do you have to do to manage it, and what an FDA-approval means. In an over-drugged society, where a pill is supposed to fix everything, how can we expect a poor, lowly educated parent with minimal resources make what to her (given that it's probably a single-female headed household) may seem to be a rational choice in the best interest of her child?

The Afterw@rd

Monday, September 28, 2009

Revisiting the Happiness Contagion

Towards the end of last year I wrote about the happiness contagion findings of Drs. Nicholas Christakis and James Fowler. Namely, how good and bad social habits and behaviors were socially contagious within your social network. Some of their findings were that happiness was more contagious than sadness or loneliness, and directionality of the relationship mattered, that is, if I hold a friend in high regard their behavior will have a greater effect on me even if the opposite is not true.

The linked article offers a more nuanced critique of both the confirmations and uncertainties of their findings.

Needless to say, I'm still curious how these behaviors would affect the mind of a mentally ill person. Would the number of mentally individuals matter in a group? How would gender affects follow the same correlations as with the Framingham dataset? I'm also curious about how coupling or bundling behaviors can affect say weight loss and joy to overall mental health of your friend's friend's friend. These are just some of the questions that I have to get them started.

Enjoy the read!

The Afterw@rd

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Health Care Reform and Suicide Prevention

Healthcare reform is currently being debated in the U.S. Congress and we want to ensure you know how important it is to include suicide prevention priorities in this historic legislation. SPAN USA/AFSP needs you to tell your Senators and Representatives about these priorities. Health reform legislation currently includes many positive provisions that will lead to greater access to mental health and substance use treatment, increase early identification of mental health and substance use disorders, and provide funding for prevention and wellness programs. However, in conjunction with SPAN USA/AFSP's health reform priorities, we remain concerned that:

· mental health and substance use parity be provided within all insurance plans covered by the legislation;
· coordination of care provisions include behavioral health providers and integrate mental health and substance use services with primary care; and
· prevention and wellness provisions include suicide prevention, not just chronic disease prevention.

Therefore SPAN/AFSP is asking you to meet with your members of Congress while they are home during the remaining weeks of the summer recess.

Please follow the steps below, asking your Congressmen to provide parity for all; coordinate care for suicide attempt survivors and those with mental illness; and include suicide prevention along with chronic disease prevention in grant programs!

Here is what you can do to help create this change:

1. Make an appointment at a district office close to you.

How to set up a meeting:

-Check your Member's website for information on setting up a meeting (many offices require a written request)

-Call the office and ask to speak to the person in charge of scheduling. Identify yourself as a constituent and an advocate with SPAN USA/AFSP, and request a meeting with the official regarding health reform.

-Make sure to follow up as the process may take some time.Keys to success:-Stick to your talking points (provided below).

-Be specific about SPAN USA/AFSP's priorities for health reform.-Treat staff with respect.

-Deliver your entire message within ten minutes.

-Get the card of the legislator (as well as staff that you meet with) and follow up within two weeks.Meeting talking points:

-Who you are: Introduce yourself.Why you are there: Describe your role in the district/state's suicide prevention community.

-Why this is important: Explain the impact of suicide on you, the local community and provide some state statistics.

-What you can do: You can ask for them to support suicide prevention health reform priorities and leave behind the document with the requests.

2. Find out when your local official is hosting a town hall meeting.

-Make sure to be well prepared.

-Ask a specific question related to suicide prevention and health reform.

3. Invite the official to a local meeting, community walk, or another event.

-Include basics such as time, date, location, and your contact information.

-Incorporate facts that will get the official's attention--e.g., number of people attending and if the media is attending..

4. Reporting Your Efforts

-Make sure to report how the visit/town hall went to SPAN USA/AFSP by using the paper form available here or via an online survey available here.

-Follow up with a thank you letter to the official or staff you met with.

-Encourage others you know to make similar visits.

If you have any questions, please contact Brian Altman at baltman@spanusa.org or 202-449-3600, x103.

Monday, August 31, 2009

Mentally Ill US Citizen Deported

I am in such shock I don't even know where to begin. It would be easier for me to better understand this horrifying true story if it had been a Spanish-speaking only U.S. citizen or even someone who was actually of Mexican descent, but this is just not the case. Mark Lyttle's story is neither of these and it's so sad, I had to laugh to stop from crying.

Mark Lyttle's story broke when Dr. Jacqueline Stevens, associate professor from University of California, Santa Barbara, got hold of the details and blogged about it. According to Dr. Stevens, his story is not unique, 10,000 U.S. citizens get deported annually.

Unfortunately for Mr. Lyttle, 32, born in Salisbury, North Carolina, was probably having a Manic episode when he committed a misdemeanor that landed him jail. Dr. Stevens writes,

Last week I received Mark's "alien file" maintained by the Department of Homeland Security. Among dozens of documents revealing the incompetence and even treachery of ICE, Customs and Border Patrol agents, and an immigration judge in Atlanta are ones triggering a series of events resulting in Mark's four month journey through five countries in Latin America.

On August 27, 2008, according to a guard at the Neuse Correctional Institute, "five or six ladies who do the admin intakes" would have been typing into the North Carolina Offender database vital statistics for the approximately 60 inmates they were screening that day.

For Mark, serving a 100 day sentence for a misdemeanor, this meant a record stating:

Race: OTHER

Complexion: MEDIUM

Ethnicity: ORIENTAL

Place of Birth: MEXICO


Mark says he remembers the interview. The woman told him he had brown skin, so maybe he was from Mexico. She was going to alert ICE to follow up. (Perhaps she did this by typing "Mexico" as Mark's place of birth? I guess Mark was lucky: she could have typed "China" -- of course Mark has no relatives from Asia, either.)


The psychologist that examined him before his first of several deportation diagnosed Mr. Lyttle with Bipolar I.



I don't know what's funnier that Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) data intake administrators did not know what a Mexican looks like or that a clearly looking black man standing in a Southern state was Mexican and Oriental without a speck of an accent or a Latino name. No, Jose Thomas does not count. If it did NPR and Fox New Sunday commentator Juan Williams should be looking over his shoulder, starting NOW. Mentally ill folks can have a little fun too, but I guess Mr. Lyttle's jokes with the system left him with a bitter taste.

The scandalous part was that it took one day for State Department employee in Guatemala to verify that Mark Lyttle was a U.S. citizen. It's amazing that employees at ICE couldn't afford him the right to do their job properly, a job our tax payer dollars are paying for.

This is one of those cases that gives credence to why organizations like Mind Freedom International exist. It takes Mad Pride to represent and fight to be heard and treated with respect.

Go on Mark Lyttle, tell your story, with you Mad self.

The Afterw@rd

Wednesday, August 26, 2009

A Right Winger's Take on Mental Ilness

John Hawkins really thinks he knows something about living with mental illness!

The mentally ill are constantly discriminated against. They are stigmatized, rather than embraced. Folks would rather look away than actually face the conditions under which people with mental illness are treated. The list of trials and tribulations goes on and on. But, alas, I can feel Hawkins ignorance. Mental illness does not have a political party affiliation, but his party is definitely making it worse off for those who are mentally ill to receive proper treatment.

Why can't mentally ill people have a right to a second, and yes, even third, opinion? Forcibly, taking any medication should be based on a patient's right to chose. It is up to us to create a safe space for people to freely admit that something is actually wrong.

In Pennsylvania Teen Screen is a test that is given to teens to help "reduce" suicide; however, it was funded by those deep pockets. It makes it difficult to trust this particular industry. Check out Allen Jones' whistleblower's tale.



The Afterw@rd

PS Thanks TorturedSoul for the heads up!

Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Death Paneling Living Wills

On August 23, 2009, Fox New Sunday ran the following spin bit.



I feel it was disingenuous for FNS to cite "Your Life, Your Choices", as an Obama Administration problem when it was a document produced, distributed, and adopted under the Bush Administration. The document serves as a bad workbook example for end-of-life options and for drafting living will documents.

Granted, all the right winged false spin regarding proposed death panels within health care reform bills, still under negotiation, have virtually killed (at least in the Senate) any hope to have "voluntary end of life counseling". By spinning this story last Sunday, FNS tried to make a link where one doesn't really exists. Tricky, Fox!

However, end-of-life counseling is important. These sensitive discussions among family and friends are most fruitful when folks are healthy and well, not when elderly are knocking on heaven's door and it's simply a second past too late. 1 out of 4 elderly above the age of 65 end their life prematurely. These same individuals visited their doctor's at least 30 days before completion. A counseling session at that time could have raised warning signs for family members and care takers. At the end of the day, those who will suffer most for the proverbial pulling of the plug on the counseling option are those least able to afford it.

With all that said, an interesting point arises regarding our own choices on end of life matters. There seems to be a thin line between suicide and dying with dignity under certain debilitating conditions. Robert Pearlman, author of "Your Life, Your Choices," seems to be straddling that line. What I find is that the pamphlet could use better question structure and word choices. Also, with additional adjustments, it could serve as great indicator for mental health flags. Maybe it was this discussion that allowed for a much needed segue to analyzing suicide rate of soldiers coming back from Iraq and Afghanistan.

Another interesting point that the pamphlet brings to light is the inquiry of your church's stand on suicide, but that's for another blog entry.

The Afterw@rd

Saturday, August 15, 2009

Having A This-Ability

I was surfing through the web and found that actor Joe Pantoliano was diagnosed with Clinical Depression. He took his diagnosis and transformed it to start an organization called "No Kidding, Me too!"

The mission of the organization is to eliminate the stigma surrounding brain disorders, thereby allowing people to freely claim their this-ability and seek help. He brings his message across with humor, lightness, and depth. All the Afterw@rd can hope for.

I agree with Joey that there is power in claiming your this-ability and using the talents and creativity entrusted for the greater good. Removing the stigma is at the root of it all.

Check out this clip from his upcoming documentary trailer.



Let's all step into our greatness because of our this-abilities.

The Afterw@rd

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

The Passing of an Advocate

Eunice Kennedy Shriver passed away yesterday. She, indeed was, such a remarkable, trailblazing woman who lived fully and advocated strongly for those with mental health disorders.

She shared not only the Kennedy name but their fire as well in defense of those like her sister, Rosemary Kennedy, who was institutionalized from the age of 23. Eunice openly discussed how we should treat those with mental retardation, convincing the general public that those with mental disabilities can be productive members of society.

I celebrate Eunice's accomplishments and learn from her experiences.

No one need live with and bear the stigma of a mental disorder. The Special Olympics is a repudiation of fringe living and a stand for being fully present where ever you are on the mental spectrum.

Cheers, Eunice, to a life well lived.

The Afterw@rd

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Surviving Versus Living

Today is Mami's anniversary of her passing. Today, I am the same age as Mami when she decided to take her life. A date I have been working towards since this blog's inception.

Before I was a survivor.

I'd survive day to day, rationalizing events occurred. I told myself medical services in the 70s were not the same as they are now. No one then knew Spanish. No one really understood what it was she had. The files have all been lost in the abyss of Bellevue. But the reality is I don't have to look too far to see the holes in the health care system.

In the end, it does not really matter. She is now gone and I know I don't have to look too far to know what plagues my family. All I can do is fight for those who still choose live.

While I have always found strength from self-created environments and supportive circles, I now see these groups as a healthy living mechanism. I separate the chaff from the wheat. I love myself enough to take care of myself. I take a bottom up approach. It's an on going project.

I review my life trajectory and see how very different it is from Mami's experience in the States. I see how our achievements differ, how proud of me she would have been, how resilient, resourceful, creative I have become. I do my best to live righteously, lovingly, honestly with all, not too different from the stories I've heard of how Mami was in life.

I feel blessed that even in my darkest hours (and there have been several), I can still see light. I stand firm on not being blind sighted ever again. I proactively move when the time is right. I rest when my body says rest. I sleep when my body says sleep. And I thrive always. I make mistakes and fail, but I make sure to review and not lose the lesson. I am so much stronger for it. I build on those experiences.

I finally feel like love can exists in my life. Her experiences are not mine for I am not her. Life is too short. In fact, love is already here. I just enjoy it when it presents itself. Love comes at just the right time. I receive it and I give it. I make sure to show others how I appreciate their effort, presence, attention and advice, recognizing, I'm not always perfect because perfect is the death of life.

Before I was a survivor.

Today, I move on to living.

The Afterw@rd

P.S. These past couple of years have been interesting to say the least. I would like to thank the following folks for their consistency, caring, and visionary inspiration:

* Rita Project
* Lois Reddick and Gamila Baptiste
* Gino Williams
* The Buckners
* My Community Group
* To all my other friends and family who took time to reach out to me and/or to listen to me when I needed a friend.

Monday, August 10, 2009

Studying Soldier Suicides

Last year, I expressed my disappointment on current soldier suicides rates.

Finally, I can start to breath a little easier. Last October, the National Institute of Mental Health and the Army have teamed up to face soldier suicides head on. They are pulling the ostrich's head out of the sand. And it sounds like more than just lip service:

The five-year, $50 million study...is an ambitious attempt to solve the mystery.


I pray that those who are in the top of their fields are working on this. I look forward to seeing the initial results.

Staying tuned...

The Afterw@rd

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Depressing News Indeed

Seeing the Funny?

Early this week on Late Night with Jimmy Fallon, the introductory monologue, like always, reviewed what seemed like the Yahoo! news of the day. Fallon is still warming up to his new role, but he is much smoother now that his nerves have calmed down. For the first three days he kicked some news (without his typical dead joke wince) about how antidepressants use doubled from 1996 to 2005 and how depression had been diagnosed in kids as young as 3 years old and in second graders. The audience laughed. They must have understood. I think laughter is healthy, even if it is at yourself.

But those in the know, also know, this is no laughing matter. It's the difference of laughing at you rather than with you. Depression is a real deal with scary consequences if symptoms are left untreated. The question of the day was, what does treatment really look like? No article really touched on that.

And that's what scares me.

It's too easy to say, hey, this is just the Pharma movement looking to pump up their billion dollar sales bottomline.

More than 164 million prescriptions were written in 2008 for antidepressants, totaling $9.6 billion in U.S. sales, according to IMS Health.


I've been know to be too idealistic and naive that it hurts. I like to think that's just the wise Latina in me.

I am no doctor, but here is how I see the writing on the wall. Are we going to sit idly by as pills are popped without proper weekly supervision or talk therapy treatment with a patient. Are we all not listening to the same antidepression commercials where the fine print person comes on to say that along with bad breath, acne, constipation and dizziness, etc. that antidepressant treatment in children and young adults causes/increases depression symptoms, including suicidal idealation?

What are we to do? Well, my answer is to pass health care reform. Most people must self-select their treatments based on how much it costs them. In this day of over medication, it's just easier to pop a pill and think it will all be taken care of. (In my opinion, primary care doctors misdiagnose and thus, over prescribe antidepressants, many without really keeping up with the changes in the field of psychiatry.) We now must choose between our very health and our financial survival. In this good US of A, I just find that to be unacceptable.

And yes, I am nervous. You can even say anxious. Why? The Birther Movement, who insist that President Barack Obama was born in Kenya despite all the proof shown, have joined forces with the Swift Boat people, Dick Armey and Freedomworks.org, to kill health care reform for those 50 million people without insurance and for those who think their insurance will last forever under the status quo. All those lobbyist (yes, including Pappas from Freedomworks) are all laughing themselves to the bank. Cha-ching and bling, bling, Dick.



Either we come with it to face the Brooks Brother's protesters or we may just prematurely die or go banckrupt trying to live with the status quo, which ever comes first.

The Afterw@rd

Monday, August 3, 2009

Boy, Interruped TONITE on HBO!

I met Dana Perry, director of "Boy, Interrupted," last June 26 at the HBO premiere of the documentary in Chicago, IL. I looked into her eyes and saw a mother's pain. She is still working through the interruption. It's only logical.

The documentary film, which will be on HBO tonight with an accompanying DVD release tomorrow, tells the story of Evan Perry, Dana Perry's son, who at 15 decided prematurely to end his life. This is a story of a mother's struggle with a bipolar child. This is a story of how silence and denial doesn't out live the truth. Mental illness is real. It's genetic. Its treatable, but only if discussed. It teaches that responsibility and stigma matter. It speaks the vigilance of parents aware of a history gone unspoken.

Regina Weinreich did a very poignant interviewed of Dana and her struggles making this film. It was the Chicken Soup for her soul, yet the truth is that one never truly heals from a passing such as this.

When seeing the film, I found that stigma played a much larger part than discussed. It goes back again to the simple basics of helping people understand what it means to suffer from a disease such as this. Evan, being a manic case, on one extreme, while other milder cases hide in the shadows.

The film is a personal story. But I can't help but wonder about the millions of people who have to deal but lack the resources with which the Perry's were blessed. However, the film is definitely a start and illustration of an open wound.

I hope enough people see it and start to learn what it means to live and to die. And how an interruption affects those left behind.

The Afterw@rd

Sunday, July 26, 2009

A Battle for the Soul of American Medicine

In the New Yorker, Atul Gawande told a story: It was the best of times. It was the worst of times. No truer Dickensian words were better inferred. Gawande told us the story of McAllen, Texas, a town whose doctor's got bit with the entrepreneurial bug.

"[A] medical community [who] came to treat patients the way subprime-mortgage lenders treated home buyers: as profit centers."


Gawande's article goes to the heart of the health care reform battle. He cites is as a tale of two cities: McAllen versus El Paso, Texas. Two towns with similar demographic make up and populations of about 700,000, yet significantly disparate Medicare per enrollee costs. Turns out McAllen on average charges Uncle Sam for about $15,000 per Medicare enrollee, twice their income per capita as well as twice the national average, and about half as much as what is spent in El Paso. (The data is from 2006, the best available for the analysis performed.)

Why? Because they doctor's can. The incentive pay structure is per exam performed, not for overall quality of care given. In McAllen, doctors stopped being doctor's and became business men. Are they providing better health care for all these tests? The data simply says it: no.

Providing health care is like building a house. The task requires experts, expensive equipment and materials, and a huge amount of coördination. Imagine that, instead of paying a contractor to pull a team together and keep them on track, you paid an electrician for every outlet he recommends, a plumber for every faucet, and a carpenter for every cabinet. Would you be surprised if you got a house with a thousand outlets, faucets, and cabinets, at three times the cost you expected, and the whole thing fell apart a couple of years later? Getting the country’s best electrician on the job (he trained at Harvard, somebody tells you) isn’t going to solve this problem. Nor will changing the person who writes him the check.


So what to do? Change the payer-playbook, charge for overall quality care, rather than quantity care. It goes back to a wise old saying, "patient care should always come first." So Doc, don't pay-a-hate, coordinate.

Thanks Gawande!

The Afterw@rd

Friday, July 24, 2009

Giving Meaning to Evidence-based

In this era of health "insurance" reform, everyone is looking for proof that reform is the better option than the status quo.

Social policies within the United States Armed Forces have served us well in race relations. Why not in health, particularly in suicide prevention?

The Suicide Prevention Action Network, a division of the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention, is seeking that states accurately track and evaluate health results. But what does that mean? What does that actually look like in the realm of suicide prevention?

Suicides in the armed forces are an all time high. The Defense Department is not only on notice, but finally has noticed. They are doing something about it. Proper evaluation of the prevention strategies they are executing on could potentially serve as a benchmark for other suicide prevention programs nationwide.

This is the insular, control case everyone has been waiting for.

The Afterw@rd

Monday, July 20, 2009

HEALTH REFORM NOW!!

Thank you for applying for a CareFirst BlueCross BlueShield or CareFirst BlueChoice plan. Unfortunately, your application has been denied.


Cherry-picking. That's what I call it.

I was just rejected for medical insurance. I just got out of an extremely toxic work environment. It took it's toll on me and my health. Here I am trying to love myself enough to take care of myself. But self-care comes at too high of a cost. It just sounds too much like right.

Pending recent economic factors, medical care was the number one cause of bankruptcy in America.

The route we are heading with health care in America is simply unsustainable. Here is a case for rationed health care.

I thank God and a strong grassroots movement for the passing of the Mental Health Parity Bill. But more still needs to be done to ensure that mental health checkups and proper holistic treatment is included in the health reform package.

Go to the Suicide Prevention Action Network (a subdivision of AFSP).

Scroll to the bottom of the page to Alerts and Updates.

Follow the instructions to fill in your zip code and identify your Congressional and Senate representatives to ensure the mental health care is properly included in the health reform package.

DO IT NOW!!!!

Lives hang in the balance.

What do we want? MENTAL HEALTH REFORM! When do we want it? NOW!

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, July 9, 2009

If You're in New York City July 19, 2009


This seems like a awesome play to go see, "Call me Crazy: Diary of a Mad Social Worker." As a native New Yorker, the fact that the play is at the legendary Nuyorican Poet's Cafe says it all. They always drop knowledge.

236 E. 3rd St. (btnw Ave B & C), NY, NY 10009

It's only $15 bucks. Interested? Buy tickets at www.theatremania.com or call 212.352.3101. Have more questions? Email callmecrazy@HDLPoet.com

'Nuf Said.

Makes me want to go home.

The Afterw@rd

Drink Your Milk And Get Your Sun

This is something deep and worthy of consideration...

Therese Borchard writes:

I've been wondering how vitamin D and mental illness are related, so I did a search and found that vitamin D does, indeed, play a role in mental illness based on these reasons from the Vitamin D Council's website:

1. Epidemiological evidence shows an association between reduced sun exposure and mental illness.
2. Mental illness is associated with low 25-hydroxyvitamin D [25(OH)D] levels.
3. Mental illness shows a significant comorbidity with illnesses thought to be associated with vitamin D deficiency.
4. Theoretical models (in vitro or animal evidence) exist to explain how vitamin D deficiency may play a causative role in mental illness.
5. Studies indicate vitamin D improves mental illness.

Here's even more details, according to the Vitamin D Council:

* Mental illness has increased as humans have migrated out of the sun.
* There is epidemiological evidence that associates vitamin D deficiency with mental illness. Two small reports studied the association of low 25(OH)D levels with mental illness and both were positive.
* Depression has significant co-morbidity with illnesses associated with hypovitaminosis D such as osteoporosis, diabetes, heart disease, hypertension, multiple sclerosis, and rheumatoid arthritis.
* Vitamin D has a significant biochemistry in the brain. Nuclear receptors for vitamin D exist in the brain and vitamin D is involved in the biosynthesis of neurotrophic factors, synthesis of nitric oxide synthase, and increased glutathione levels -- all suggesting an important role for vitamin D in brain function. Rats born to severely vitamin D deficient dams have profound brain abnormalities.


Yikes.
***

Originally published on Beyond Blue at Beliefnet.com. Linked through Huffington Post.

Sunday, July 5, 2009

Happy 4th of July: Daddy's Girl

I was daddy's little girl. As an only child, our relationship was beyond father daughter, it was more like a man and his shadow. Our morning breakfast routine started when I was very young, during the early school years. My dad would drive me to the bus stop, I would kiss him on the cheek and off I would go. He was the kind of father who was constantly teaching me and at the same time, he was constantly learning himself. I shared his love for college basketball; he taught me how to use my first laptop and took me kayaking for my very first time. He let me shine as he stood behind the camera at every show or recital, and would listen as he knelt by my bedside to say our prayers each night. My dad and I shared everything including our blue eyes.

It was not until I became older that I could see what a successful man my dad had become and the goals he had reached. Traveling overseas in the army during his early adult years, he worked his way through college eventually earning his masters degree, and then making a successful career in system technologies at well known university around where we lived.

My dad loved his family and his co-workers alike, having a general curiosity about life. It was his ambition which I admired most about him, how he would never let anything stand in his way. He instilled in me that I could achieve anything, as long as I was not afraid of the challenge.

It was as I grew older, my dad first started to show signs of clinical depression. The symptoms characteristically are irritability, fatigue, and lack of interest in activities which are normally fulfilling. Maybe I was so wrapped up in the mini dramas that make up a girl's teen years, or maybe he was just good at hiding it, but it took me a while to notice it. He would miss a few morning breakfast routines, stopped attending church with my mother and I, and stayed home from work more often; but it did little to the relationship I had with my dad.

Above all, my dad was patient and understanding even when it came to the subject of Math, my least favorite subject. The night before a giant pre-algebra test in Eighth grade, my dad and I were going over problems, me getting more nervous as my frustration built. I still remember crying in my dad’s arms that night, like a small child. The next day my dad dropped me off in the morning and I gave him a kiss on cheek and was on my way just like a typical morning. That afternoon I received a 94 on the test and was so excited to return home that night and tell him. My anxious waiting was answered by something no one can be prepared for. A knock on my door changed my world forever. My dad never came home from work that night.

No one expected a man of such grace and dignity, so ambitious and passionate about life to turn around and take his own. It turned out that the only thing that was standing in his way was himself. I thought back to the night before when I was crying because of my frustration, little did I know or truly understand the tremendous frustration that was going on inside my dad, the pain he still was trying to hide from me.

How could he not see the brilliant man I saw in him?

As the years have gone by since his death, I have asked myself many questions and have learned that brilliant men like my father are not the only ones that suffer from this disease.

When it was time for me to go to college, I decided to go to school at the same University that my dad spent 27 years of his life as a student and an employee. The institution he loved so very much was the same place he ended it all. Some thought it was strange that I returned to place where my father literally ended it all, but after all he was the one that taught me that you should not let things stand in your way and that almost anything can be achieved as long as you are not afraid of a challenge. I decided to go to a place my father was so much apart of, to be among his colleagues, and a place to keep his memory alive.

Though the days that I passed the building where he ended it all were challenging, it gave me the chance to tell people about the brilliant man that my dad was.

I am not ashamed of my dad because of his disease, I only feel sorry for those who do not realize or understand its devastating effects. The disease can affect anyone. Depression is hard to detect, it is a disease that affects people even though they do their best to hide it.

There is not a day that goes by that I don not wish for ordinary things, like a simple phone conversation or rooting for our college basketball team together. I think about the moments in my life I wish he had been apart of and the sixty-year-old man he would be today. I am sharing my story today because people should not turn their backs on depression because they think it is a challenge to understand, it is a disease that needs to be brought into the light. The light in my dad burned out long before it should. It is my mission in life to help keep that flame of knowledge and awareness burning for others.

By J. Suwalski
Tweet @J9007

Thursday, July 2, 2009

Death by MySpace, Revisited

On November 26, 2008, I wrote about the landmark court ruling against Lori Drew who created a bogus MySpace account to cyberbully 13 year old Megan Meier, leading to the young girl's suicide.

According to the New York Times, today, "Judge George H. Wu said that he was tentatively acquitting the woman, Lori Drew, of misdemeanor counts of accessing computers without authorization and that the ruling will be final when he issues his written decision...Judge Wu said that were Ms. Drew’s conviction to stand, anyone who has ever violated MySpace’s terms of service would be guilty of a misdemeanor." Thus, he posits that such a verdict would be a violation of our constitutional rights.

Is Judge Wu smoking crack? While I can see where he is going, not all misdemeanors end in the death of a 13 year old. A suicide no less. This woman aided and abetted in cyberbullying. Megan was of a generation that has never lived without internet. The impact this has on a young psyche is still not well known. This is why new rules regarding internet communication are so important.

We are entering new territory. Nevertheless, to paraphrase Martin Luther King, Jr., just because we don't see the whole staircase doesn't mean we don't take the first step.

This is one of the reasons why Suzy's Law is so important.

The Afterw@rd

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Coping With Bipolar Disorder

Yesterday, on the Diane Rehm show, she had three fantastic guests that faced the trials and tribulations of diagnosing/treating Bipolar Disorder and having a child with Bipolar Disorder. However, with an estimated 2.5 million people in the US facing this disease, it is imperative that we act proactively.

I recognize that it is difficult to treat something we don't fully understand but we know what works. Some of the challenges and good advice is provided in this show.

It is imperative that health reform includes proper treatment for mental psychiatric disorders.

The Afterw@rd

AFSP Overnight Walk

We raised $1.2 million and so much more is needed.
I just got to feel my feet today. :)
You can still donate through August 31, 2009.
Do what you can to help support vital suicide prevention research.
For more information visit www.afsp.org.

Be Blessed,
The Afterw@rd

Saturday, June 27, 2009

Walking 18-miles to Save a Life

I'm walking 18-miles tonight at The Overnight because

* Someone dies by suicide every 16 minutes in the US
* There is one suicide attempt every minute
* 33,000 die by suicide each year
* Suicide is the 3rd leading cause of death among teens and young adults
* Depression is the leading cause of suicide
* More than 19 million suffer from depression in the US
* The best way to prevent suicide is through early detection diagnosis & treatment

If you haven't already: Donate to www.theovernight.org
Look up The Afterw@rd-COSIA Team.

All funds will got to support the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention, a 501(c)3 organization. This year's Overnight donations will go to support the following:

* 18 new research studies advancing our understanding of suicide and ways to prevent it
* help establish 5 new AFSP chapters across the country
* help recruit thousands of grassroots volunteers to advocate for suicide prevention
* help distribute new educational film for high school students to teach them bout depression
* help the local IL chapter with regional suicide prevention programs

I'm taking my first step towards a life well lived and helping others do the same.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Too Late To Learn?

National Public Radio recently interviewed Todd Snider on the release of his new album, The Excitement Plan, where he uses therapeutic humor to manage the bipolar swings.

The songs touch the heart of the struggle of what it means to be bipolar. There is one song that wishes his therapist could be more specific than "do the best you can do." Another song that finds the comedy of errors of landing in jail as a "political prisoner" for a drug possession. Yet another song highlights that you can run a Doc "No-hitter" Ellis, where one can do good when running highly wrong. Indeed, none of these songs are about following conventional wisdom.

While I can't say I agree with the appropriateness of all the songs' content, I do agree with the approach. The songs are real. They also reflect his personal walk of discovery. Drugs and alcohol are often used to medicate the swings when we can't control or grasp how low we can go.

I can understand and empathize with Snider's struggle. You would figure that at 40-something you would know better, to do things right. Instead, we often feel like we're in a constant 20-something hamster wheel learning mode. It's like reading a 15 year old journal entry and seeing the same drama that just happened yesterday. The hard fact to face is that the only common denominator is you. It is so nice to have people coming out of the closet with their struggles. It let's us know that we are not alone, that those we love are not alone in their struggles.

However, it's empowering to think that if we embrace that which is therapeutic, that which is supportive, that which brings us solace, and do that which allows us to feel our best, we might just be on to something that allows us to be the best we can be not despite the illness but because of it.

Todd's songs are actually kind of catchy too. Do check him out.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Embracing Creativity and Breaking Cycles

Simon Doonan, New York Observer writer and Creative Director of Barney's in New York, was not your typical son in a home full of crazy. We would not have expected anything less from a family where suicide, schizophrenia and other mental illness have left their mark. However, to me this is a truly inspiring story of how one man transcended and embraced his surroundings. Check out his book Beautiful People which is now a BBC sitcom about growing up in a family full of crazy. This is about laughing instead of crying, about leaping instead of crawling and living life the way it's meant to be lived. This is in celebration of all fathers and grandfathers on this wonderful Father's Day holiday. Here's to embracing the beautiful people in our own lives and those no longer with us.

Enjoy the links.

Happy Father's Day
The Afterw@rd

Friday, June 5, 2009

David Carradine Did What?

Straight from the American Foundation of Suicide Prevention website:

Research has shown that graphic, sensationalized or romanticized descriptions of suicide deaths in the news media can contribute to suicide contagion, popularly referred to as “copycat” suicides. Media reports on suicide can also be a source of misinformation; for example, when suicide is attributed in a single event such as the loss of a job or a relationship, with no mention of underlying factors such as the individual’s depression, substance abuse, or lack of access to treatment for these conditions.

Don't newscasters know this? Yet the last 48 hours I keep hearing David Carradine did this, he did that. The rope was found here and there and everywhere.

Now it turns out that his might not have even been a suicide. But the information is now out there. Wannabe copycats were paying attention. Who will be held accountable? We all know that no one really reads the corrections.

Interestingly enough I just learned about Suzy's Law a.k.a H.R. 853. This is a legislation currently working its way through Congress which will make it a crime for folks to help someone commit suicide on-line. Right now those who egg on telling others to kill themselves are protected by freedom of speech but have no moral or ethical grounding. Suzy's law is something to think about.

This is especially true in this world where the 24-hour news cycle reigns.

Responsible coverage of suicide, in contrast, can educate wide audiences about the likely causes of suicide, its warning signs, trends in suicide rates, recent treatment advances and other ways suicide can be prevented. Stories about well-known figures who have successfully sought treatment for depression, alcoholism and other conditions that convey suicide risk can also be a powerful impetus for readers to address such issues in their own lives.

If folks were only more respectful...maybe more people would actually seek the help they really need.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Understanding Depression as a Disease

Check this video out. I think the tide is turning to recognition. It's refreshing and so awesome that people are coming out.



The Afterw@rd

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Overwhelmed by News

The last couple of days I've been overwhelmed by news whether it is cyber-bullying that leads to suicide or how mental health is rarely treated in a prisons or the Army's reactive stand on what to do to mitigate the ever increasing suicide rate among soldiers serving in Afghanistan and Iraq.

One thing is certain, The Afterw@rd must be realized because for every suicide there is a whole family suffering in the wings.

If you are a survivor, submit a letter written to who you lost letting them know the impacts of their passing.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, May 14, 2009

May is Mental Health Month

Mental Health Month is an annual observance sponsored by the National Mental Health Association (NMHA) and the National Council for Community Behavioral Healthcare (NCCBH) and supported by the OSHE Division. It is designed to increase awareness about mental health and mental illness.

Good mental health is fundamental to physical health and is important to personal well-being. Poor mental health can affect a person’s ability to lead a healthy, balanced, and productive life. Problems with mental health can affect thought processes, the processing of emotions, and social behavior. These problems can become serious and disabling, leaving the one unable to function in the world. Many people fail to recognize mental health problems and as a result, never seek treatment.

Take time this May to review your mental health and well-being. Being over stressed may lead to mental health problems. Stress is everywhere, and can be a positive motivator, helping people accomplish things in times of a crisis. It can also build and become difficult to handle. While stress overload is a mental health problem, it can affect your physical health and cause physical symptoms or signs.

Signs of Stress Overload:
● Fatigue
● Headaches
● Loss of concentration
● Difficulty making decisions
● Inability to control anger
● Increased use of alcohol, caffeine, cigarettes or drugs
● Increased or decreased eating
● Feeling overwhelmed
● Thinking often about what you need to do

If you suffer from one or more of these physical symptoms, you may be overstressed. Examine your life and try to identify where the stress is coming from. There are two main sources of stress: life events and every day hassles. Review the chart below. If you have had one life event (left hand column) within the past year you have moderate stress. Two to three life events in the past year leads to high stress and more than three life events in the past year leads to very high stress. If you had one or two daily hassles (right hand column) the past week, you experienced moderate stress. Three to six daily hassles can lead to high stress and more than six daily hassles in one week can lead to very high stress.

Potential Stressors: Life Events

Moving
Getting married
New baby
Divorce or separation
Injury
Illness
New job
Loss of a job
Inheriting or winning money
Financial problems
Injury or illness of a loved one
Death of a loved one
Victim of a crime
Legal problems
New boyfriend or girlfriend
Broke up with a boyfriend or girlfriend
Stopped smoking
Went on a diet
New responsibilities at home
New responsibilities at work
No place to live
Hospitalization
Drinking or using street drugs caused problems

Potential Stressors: Daily Hassles

Not enough money to take care of necessities
Not enough money to spend on leisure
Crowded living situation
Crowded public transportation
Long drives or traffic back ups
Feeling rushed at home
Feeling rushed at work
Arguments at home
Arguments at work
Doing business with unpleasant people (sales clerks, waiters/waitresses, transit clerks, toll booth collectors)
Noisy situation at home
Noisy situation at work
Not enough privacy at home
Minor medical problems
Lack of order or cleanliness at home
Lack of order or cleanliness at work
Unpleasant chores at home
Unpleasant chores at work
Living in a dangerous neighborhood

Finding Solutions: Ways to cope with stress:

● Be aware of situations that caused stress in the past
● Schedule meaningful, enjoyable activates
● Schedule time for relaxation
● Have balance in your daily life
● Develop a support system
● Take care of your health
● Talk about your feelings or write them in a journal
● Avoid being hard on yourself
● Use relaxation techniques
● Maintain your sense of humor
● Exercise
● Make or listen to music
● Doing art or going to see art
● Developing a new hobby or playing games

These are all tools that can help you battle stress, after you have identified it.

More information about stress and the tools you can use to combat it can be found on the first link below.

http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov/cmhs/CommunitySupport/toolkits/illness/workbook/handout7.asp

These tools are supplied to help you, but they might not be able to solve all mental health problems. If you think you or someone you care about may be suffering from a mental health problem that is affecting everyday life, seek professional help.

More information about mental health and how to seek help can be found on at
http://mentalhealth.samhsa.gov

The first step is always awareness of your mental health.

Source: FEMA Intranet site.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

The Soloist

After the IRS cleaned out my clock this past April 15th, I felt it best to get back to working on the hard task of making myself better by tackling the crafting project I've had such a challenging time facing: a memory scrapbook about my Mom.

I went to the American Visionary Art Museum in Baltimore, MD to get inspired through the Rita Project, a great program that brings together in a creative healing space people who have attempted suicide and survivors of loss to suicide. Turns out the day's group meeting had been canceled. But this cancellation turned out to be a blessing in disguise. I came across the most interesting life story of James Rouse (1914-1996), Master Planner of Inner Harbor in Baltimore, MD, as well as founder of Columbia, MD. It seems he was a man that truly walked into his vision of how life should be.

I left the museum refreshed and invigorated, filled with the wisdom of Rouse's inspiringing life story. Life had not always been kind to him, but his optimism, vision and willingness to maintain creative friendships were his anchor. I reached out to good visionary friends who lived in Columbia, MD and share what I had learned, paying it forward.

We decided to go to the movies and go see The Soloist, the true story of a friendship between a renown journalist, Steve Lopez, and a former cellist then homeless man, Nathaniel Ayers. It's a sobering movie that speaks truth to the issues of mental illness, homelessness, recovery, and redemption.

Ayers was a Julliard student who rather than combat his illness, he embraced it. The cost was life on the streets. But I wonder, if he could have understood, really understood, what was happening and the potential consequences of his actions, the deterioration to his mind, career, and future, if he would have acted the same way.

Yet, I'm not fully convinced. Jim Rouse said it best, "I am philosophically, spiritually, and emotionally persuaded that virtually every circumstance, however adverse or bewildering it seems to be at the moment, has a creative potential, that my task is to find that potential--to avoid preoccupation with immediate unfavorable impact and move beyond to the lesson or direction or opportunity that the Lord has opened up." Go figure that Steve Lopez always says that he is the one that got the most out of the relationship. Maybe, this was all God's plan to give Steve Lopez a hand.

The Afterw@rd

Friday, April 17, 2009

Blind Flouting Authority

Yesterday was the two-year anniversary of the Virginia Tech Massacre. This whole week I've heard of the tragic loss of the 32 individuals lost, but not many have lamented over the self-inflicted loss of Seung-Hui Cho, the perpetrator. The Afterw@rd is here to advocate on his behalf, on behalf of his family who lost a child, lost a brother.

A loss of child or a brother is hard enough. While I don't propose to know the pain the Cho family must be going through, I do understand what it feels like to experience a premature loss. The pain and the shame to me is unimaginable under the circumstances.

Nikki Giovanni, renown poet and Cho's former English professor, knew that the young man needed professional help. Yet, her cries for help -- which were his cries through his writings -- went unheeded by school authorities.

Similarly, in Springfield, MA, a mother at her wits end went to a the school authorities to request that her 11 year old son be protected from bullies that were calling him "gay." The child had never identified himself as such. The school representatives did nothing. Her child took his own life Thursday of last week.

Next week we'll be facing the tragic 9-year anniversary of the Columbine Massacre.
What have we, our school officials, our society, really learned about mental illness since then?

Intervention is need. It starts with increasing our awareness at work, at home, at school, at church, on the street. What does depression look like? How does someone with an anxiety disorder act? Take the time to educate yourself. It might help save more than one life, even your own.

Over 90% of people who die by suicide have clinical depression or another diagnosable mental disorder. Help defy the statistics by being vigilant. If you suspect that someone is suffering from depression or other mental disorder, help them find and speak to a mental health professional.

The Afterw@rd

Monday, April 6, 2009

Not Recognizing the Signs

“I can see that he was very depressed from losing his job and he was very frustrated with his English-speaking skills,” the woman, identified only as Nga, said on the “Today” show. “He didn’t share any of his thoughts and feelings, and he kept all of his frustration inside and didn’t want to share with anybody else in the family.”


Fear is a foreboding thing. In some ways fear can make you strong, giving a mother of sound mind enough strength to lift a car in order to save her child. In other ways fear can make you weak, making you so paranoid that you begin to doubt yourself and everything you see and experience.

I can just imagine the mental torture Jivery Wong endured before stepping into the American Civic Association in Binghamton, NY last Friday, April 3rd, to shoot 13 people then himself. It's hard to dissuade a man who thinks he has nothing to live for, especially if he is unwilling to be open and share his pain.

The Binghamton event was not a split second decision. It was an anguishing scene that was building and building with no stop gap measure insight. It is difficult to face these fears and not recognize the "coping" signs as they emerge. The depression, voices, visions, etc. The mind is a wondrous instrument that is not well understood.

When you see someone exhibiting extreme signs of introversion, intervention is required. Recognize that there are some things that are beyond our control. Seek a mental health professional, reach out to a friend, call LIFELINE or HOPELINE. Talk, talk, talk it out.

The Afterw@rd

Sunday, March 29, 2009

How Silence Kills...

Nicholas Hughes, the son of the poet and novelist Sylvia Plath and the British Poet Laureate Ted Hughes, killed himself at his home in Alaska, nearly a half-century after his mother and stepmother took their own lives, according to a statement from his sister.

My skin hairs raise with fear at the thought that should I avoid talking about depression, treating it like the serious disease it is, it can very well creep up and blindside me. Nicolas Hughes was just 47 years old. His mom was 30 when she gave in to despair. His stepmom, Assia Wevill, not to be left behind, killed herself and her own child, Shura, six years later. A father and his adult child are left to wonder who's next.

The pain of that family must be feeling overwhelms me. The painful silence that must have existed hurts me even more. I know about that silence. My family lives with it, coddles it, harbors it, gets drunk with it. But I have a big family. Silence, like dysfunction, is easily diffused in big families. It lacks a beginning or an end if you are not close to its root.

I'm not here to point fingers or place blame. There is no use in that. We beat ourselves enough without the help of another. I am just trying to learn how to live with the knowledge that we must always be on our guard. We must be ever vigilant for ourselves and those we love. It's a never ending battle. In a war that never ceases to amaze me with its irony, its cruelty.

Fears are meant to be confronted and surpassed. I choose to face my fear and break the silence. I choose to live.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, February 26, 2009

"Milk" and the Twinkie Defense

The minute Milk came out in the movie theaters on November 4, 2008 I knew this film would be important. The Oscars beat me to the recognition.

I really wanted to go see Milk before writing this blog. Really, I did. But the fact of the matter is that I'm cheap and only watch movies that are available at my local 99 cent video rental store, Video 95. I need only wait a few more months to get at it. I just don't want to come in late in the conversation.

Through I've learned that in times of recession to embrace this financial responsible side of myself. I also trust National Public Radio's (NPR) accounting and know enough about suicide to feel comfortable talking on this issue.

My mom passed by suicide in 1977 in New York City. I can only imagine what it must have been like for her. Dan White's suicide was a few years later after serving time in jail for murdering Harvey Milk and George Moscone. Two big cities. Same difficult time period for mental health. We still lack the kind of mental health support where recognition could work hand in hand with prevention, saving someone driven to their breaking point.

Do we even care?

Granted, I am not here to excuse White's wrong doing. However, I am here to reproach how a man can be driven to the edge and no help be available to pull him back from it.

Suicide has a funny way of leaving an indelible mark.

The sad part is there are probably those that feel justified in calling it a righteous exit. I beg to differ. The truth of the matter is that true living also means facing the music and living in the flesh life's lessons however painful they be.

White lost the opportunity to see the error of his ways.

I can now only dream of what an advocate he could have been had he given himself that opportunity.

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Happy Valentine's Day?

Wishing You...

The Afterw@rd wishes everyone a lovely Valentine's weekend. We relish and advocate for the day of love to be everyday. We hope that everyone would have a valentine. Even those who are hardest to love.

Love With Imperfection

I always wonder about the depths of unconditional love. It's easy to throw the word "unconditional" around as it relates to an instant, a single specific event in time. For believers, God so loved us unconditionally He so gave His only begotten son. Or in general, talk about the love a parent feels the first time they see their new born child.

However, no one really talks about seasoned, time-sustaining love. This is the love that exists that moves beyond the instant, which evolves over time, despite our imperfections. Can you love your child, your partner, your friend, your co-worker knowing they may be depressed, hyper-active, dysfunctional, or insert your favorite mental disorder here? It's not to say that we support or endorse inappropriate behavior, rather it's an opportunity for us to understand and address the root cause of challenging behaviors, to learn how to love in a deeper more constructive way.

It's a struggle loving through challenge, recognizing that every time we point out, four fingers point in. Do we become better for it? If so, how?

Here I am learning to love with imperfection, trying to find out.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Bicentennial Celebrations!

Today we celebrate President Lincoln's bicentennial birthday. We also celebrate the 200th birthday of another great character in U.S. history, writer Edgar Allan Poe. Distinguished individuals that have left their imprint on U.S. history.

What do both of these great men have in common? Mental disorders. It is widely known that Mr. Lincoln suffered from depression and Poe experienced manic episodes and often medicated his bipolar behavior with alcohol. (Not too unlike, Michael Phelps!)

While much has changed over the last 200 years, the stigma of mental disorders remains. It's not to say we have remained stagnant. Some progress has been made. We have increased our understanding of some mental disorders but much still remains to be done and understood. However, it's frustrating to know that treatment options are simply not as well understood, and when used only work for 50% of people who bother to get diagnosed.

What to do?

Education raises awareness, but does it tear down the stigma? We must stand firm in the belief that everyone with an mental disorder can have lasting impact when given the opportunity. Lincoln and Poe are a testament to that fact.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, January 29, 2009

The Murder-Suicide Fad?

Two Families

Two families this week, one in California and one in Ohio, decided that a fast exit from life was the best strategy with dealing with their stressful crises be it financial or personal, respectively. The male head of the household made that decision for themselves and their entire immediate family. The one thing the stories have in common is that no one saw this coming. No one saw this coming. I beg to differ. At the risk of being called nosy, do we really care to look beyond the surface?

A Thin Line

The inter-relation of homicide and suicide is too thin to slice. It's just a matter of where the anger, frustration, etc. is pointed. What lies beneath, is a deteriorated coping mechanism. The incapacity of thinking rationally for a solution, leaving you with a dead end of hopelessness. What saddens me is that this level of despair has medical answers if people just had a chance to stop and seek help.

Those Left Behind

We will never have all the answers or even know all the facts. All we can do is learn to live with the certainty of not knowing. No one need fester. No one need despair. There are places you can go, people you can see, things you can do to find hope, find healing, and see a ray light amongst the darkness. Talk to other survivors of such loss. Learn that you are not alone. We can face the issue, debunk the stigma, heal and help others do the the same.

Ask someone how they are doing today. Then take the time to really listen.

We should never feel the need to bow our heads in shame.

There is hope, there is. We just have to believe. Tomorrow will be better.

Feeling the need to help survivors cope with their loss...

The Afterw@rd

Monday, January 26, 2009

Just buck up and get over it.

Now, I like to consider myself a selective, erudite reader. However, every so often I may stumble into and stall at TMZ, erroneously click on an OMG! link, or turn my newspaper to the style section to see how non-hip I am today. Then, I shamefully and quickly move on to the news of the day.

But today was different.

Today I read something that struck me to my core. It even inspired me to dig deeper for the actual article. On January 23, 2009, Peter Davis interviewed Danny Masterson (That 70s Show) and Bijou Phillips (who knows who she is, this is the first time I've even hear of her) for Paper Magazine. Don't take it from me, let me show you the egregious quote directly from the source:

"At one point, Phillips goes off on a long tangent about the dangers of psychiatrists medicating patients for depression or anxiety. "My grandparents didn't take any pills and they were fine. Just buck up and get over it. Stop being such a [expletive] pansy," she says, her bird-like voice taking on a deeper tone. "


What?! Is she on crack or what?! No, just Scientology! Didn't John Travolta, not just finished losing his autistic son to a seizure? I will have to pull a Nancy Reagan, and "Just say No!" thanks to her advice.

The sad thing is that there are people who actually think this way. The worst part is that there are actually people who actually listen to this mess and believe it just because she said it was so.

They just don't have a clue that this is a diagnosable medical condition. A condition that needs medical attention. One million people commit suicide each year worldwide, tens of millions attempt. If depression could be controlled, then 90% of all suicides wouldn't happen.

How's that for star power? Thanks a million.

The Afterw@rd

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

The Rubber Meets the Road

Many have placed their hope on now President Barack H. Obama. I say don't. Give his administration space to make error, to be human, to earn the stature, seemingly already hoisted upon him, of being an outstanding president.

It still remains to be seen how effective he will be. How will he impact how people are treated for mental illness, on soldiers coming home with post-traumatic stress disorder, how we can work together to prevent suicide, etc. It still remains to be seen the support what support will be granted to military families, etc.

While initial steps have been positive, as President Obama said, the price of citizenship is how we hold his administration accountable for their actions.

Let us let them act.

Inaugurally yours,

The Afterw@rd

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Revelations

Suicide is such a difficult topic to talk about. It sure isn't sexy, warm or fuzzy. It produces some of the rawest of emotions. Shame, guilt, and anger, to name just a few.

I've been talking about suicide and The Afterw@rd for the last two years. In working to overcome the suicide demons, I raised money for organizations, walked 40-miles, truly put my business out on the curb e-mailing everyone I knew and their mother.

Yet it was only today that a good friend told me she had attempted once. Gladly, she's still here to talk about it. But the reason that triggered her revelation is not. She lost a former co-worker and friend to suicide last week. All the emotions came rushing back.

Everyone was thrown for a loop. No one saw the signs. No one guessed the pain. No one interceded. Now they live with the guilt, the what if, the why did he...

My friend sends me an email talking about how The Afterw@rd can make a difference.

I beg to differ. It is being in community that makes a difference. It is the letting go of the stigma, the raising of our awareness, the recognition of the signs, and the admittance that most deaths are avoidable, if we just faced the issue of "this" being a disease. It is about digging deeper, opting to not just scratch the surface of those around you.

Ask how people how they are doing. Then sitting back to listen.

That's what makes a difference. Caring for one another.

The Afterw@rd

Thursday, January 8, 2009

A Son Remembered...

Sent: Wednesday, January 07, 2009 11:24 AM
Subject: Chad

Chad's death changed my life forever. He is the one person who I knew loved me unconditionally and told me so. I think of him all the time and look at his pictures every day.

God has really been dealing with me and I am not sure where or when this came to me but it did. Chad knew how much I worried about him and how much concern I had over him. We always spoke with each other for the other not to worry about the other one. He shared with me in December on his visit how much he was worried about me. He knew I was overly concerned about his relationship and life.

Chad came to the point where he did not want us living in worry over him. He was so tired in the end and shared this with me Christmas [sic]. So one night I was awakened this fall with Chad on my mind. I knew he was in a better place, well and smiling, He was watching over me and wants me to be happy. He had no idea what his death would do to all of us.

So I try each day to celebrate his life. To remember the good things about our times. The fun times in our life and his beautiful eyes and smile. The greatest gift he had was his tender heart and giving ways.

I too will be thankful when this 1 year is behind us. Their are days when I wish him back, when I long to talk with someone or feel so lonely as he had a way about him to make me feel good. Saturday I will celebrate his life.

I would like to plant something out there but not sure what. I am going to Costo [sic] Friday and buy some flowers. He loved flowers and plants.

Nancy

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

New Year's Resolutions

I will laugh about suicide, in that out loud, curl over with an aching belly and tears streaming down my face, hyperventilating type laugh.

I will find the comedy in the pain.

I will give voice to the journey.

I will do it amongst family, those who have involuntarily faced and walked the path of loss. We are not alone.

I will find healing through writing, through sharing, through living.

I will feel hope that we can end suicide as we know it.

I will do it through you.

Submit to The Afterw@rd.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Happy New Year!

I am thankful for a new year
a new opportunity to start again
to make corrections and improvements
to tweak this, sharpen that
to make up for wrongs
to be showered and blessed for rights done
to remember and learn from those past
now gone
thankful I am still here
for lessons learned
however difficult and challenging
for friends that care
for vibrancy, overflowing talent, passion and fervor
for the things that matter
love
family and friends
health
mission
life.

Wishing you all an amazing New Year 2009!

The Afterw@rd