Studying Tolerance

Inaugural vs Policy Matters
We are less than a month away from a history making event: the inauguration of the 44th President of these United States, who also happens to be African-American. Already, President-elect Barack Obama is making waves.

In selecting Evangelical Pastor Rick Warren to bless the inauguration's opening ceremony, President-elect Obama has chosen to spend some hard earned political capital. Some pundits call it a risky move. To me, its a progressive President recognizing the breath of views he has to work with; Warren, on the other hand, is someone suffering from poor word choice (he compared gay marriage to pedophilia and polygamy). For those who don't know Warren, he's a Christian pastor who rejects the right-wing and the left-wing for the whole bird, but holds some of the typical conservative views without out letting them dominate his agenda which is mainly ending poverty.

With that said, I can understand why Warren being given such an important role, can piss some people off, particularly in the lesbian and gay community. My answer to them is to focus on what matters: policy decisions and action. Symbolic rhetoric is simply not a game changer by itself.

A Real Issue
Here is a real issue to work with. How do we effect behavioral changes from parents apt to reject their homosexual children? Homosexual teens have one of the highest rates of suicide attempts.

A study was released today in the journal Pediatrics. Lead author, Caitlin Ryan, director of Adolescent Health Initiatives at the Cesar Chavez Institute at San Francisco State University, and her researchers interviewed 200 gay and lesbian teens and young adults. Those in the study that "experienced high levels of rejection were nearly 8.5 times more likely to have attempted suicide. They were nearly six times more likely to report high levels of depression and almost 3.5 times more likely to use illegal drugs or engage in unprotected sex. That was compared with adolescents whose families may have felt uncomfortable with a gay kid, but were neutral or only mildly rejecting."

Upon learning of their child's homosexual tendencies, most conservative parents are likely to want to significantly reject, hide, or "change" their child. This does more harm than good, especially for a teen or young adult. Those are impressionable years. The lesson is that a little show of tolerance can go a long way. As a parent, fake it until you make it if you must, recognizing that kids are indeed perceptive. Life is hard enough in the world. Everyone wants to be loved at home, as is.

The Take Away
What happens at home has a much greater effect than any blessing a random man has to give who isn't really felt in your world. You dig?

The Afterw@rd

Counting Blessing this Holiday Season

Looking Back
Holidays are one of the toughest times for a survivor. This is particularly true for individuals who have experienced a recent loss. The one consolation is that tomorrow will be better, because when you are down, the only way to go is up. Know, it doesn't always hurt this much.

It may sound cheesy, but I find comfort in the Serenity Prayer. Regardless of your religious affiliation, or not, there is a lot about life in those wise words, because we will never have all the answers:

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Looking Forward
This year has been a year of many revelations and blessings. I had friends and family that supported me this year in ways that will forever be with me. It defied odds and defined friendship. I count them as my angles.

One of these hard lessons was that I finally understood what it must have been like for my mother. Depression is a disease. You can't hide, change your genes, ignore your family history, or just snap out of it. You have to tackle it head on.

It took me 30 years to get a clue, Once I understood, everything that I saw in my life growing up and my own personal experiences clicked. Because people who avoid treatment, find ways to self-medicate. Be it constructive or destructive. You choose. But face it you must, because at some point you will run out of lucky charms.

Responsibility is a bittersweet pill. Engage. Be. Think. Act.

If you are touched by this topic join me on this journey.

Let's raise awareness and help educate. Mental health and depression is a disease. Treat it like one.

Be Blessed,

The Afterw@rd

Unintentionally, Made Crook?

French aristocrat Rene-Thierry Magon de la Villehuchet, 65, a founding partner and chief executive officer of Access International Advisors, was found dead early this morning in his Manhattan office in New York. The cause? Suicide. (No need to get descriptive.) He didn't leave a note, something that many survivors know, will haunt Claudine, the wife he left behind. They had no children, but that doesn't mean that his friends or family will not bear the scars.

De la Villehuchet had invested $1.4 billion into Bernard Madoff's pyramid scheme. He made a temporary problem into a permanent solution, and fulfilled a statistic while he was at it. One in four elderly, those 65 and over, dies to suicide.

Not to beleaguer the point, but this is what happens when "the best and the brightest" are pushed aside for unprepared, ideology-focused friendships with benefits, and placed in positions of power. The Security Exchange Commission, which regulates markets and protects investors funds, ha!, was repeatedly asked by credible sources to investigate Madoff for fraud and nothing was repeatedly found.

According to the Washington Post, "Madoff was a Wall Street legend, an acquaintance of senior regulators and a major political contributor, mostly to Democrats. The SEC is investigating whether relationships between Madoff's family and regulators played a role."

Yet again, the level of incompetence that reverberated throughout the current Administration just leaves me stunned and saddened me beyond belief.

Madoff was someone that could have been contained. De la Villehuchet saw the concentrated returns and tried to disinvest for five years. His due diligence demanded it for his business and his clients. Unfortunately, the will of a charming salesman prevailed. It cost De la Villehuchet his life.

Here again is another life lost under our watch.

The Afterw@rd

Diplomatically Terrorized

The Case
The Bush Administration kept getting it wrong at home and abroad. The bad policy didn't seem to stop. Financial regulators looked the other way, as unbridled greed knew no bounds. In this post-9/11 world, we have a pair of shoes now symbolizing an unwanted, inextricable war in Iraq, a country proven to have had no connect to the 9/11 attack.

Yet, we are a country not unfamiliar with terrorism pre-9/11. We had experienced several incidents abroad. On September 19, 1989, we knew who struck UTA Flight 772. So did Libyan leader Moammar Gaddafi and the Libyan officials charged. 17 countries lost citizens. France, several African countries, and the United States to list a few. In a 2004 settlement, Libya agreed to pay those families $170 million for the lost lives, $1 million per victim.

The Loss
But for the Pugh family of Vermont, that simply was not enough. They wanted to hold Libya accountable for the actions of their citizens. The loss of Bonnie Barnes Pugh came at too high a price. You see Former Ambassador to Chad, Robert Pugh, lost a wife, and eventually due to the trauma, his career as a diplomat. Anne Carey (Pugh) lost a mother. Her son, Malcolm Pugh, after her loss, took his own life. This was a family that knew pain and the cost of a life or two.

The Judge
Under the Anti-Terrorist Act of 1996, the Pugh family, along with 44 relatives took their case before U.S. District Judge Henry H. Kennedy and, in January 2008, won a $6 billion judgment. But they haven't seen a dime, stalled in the bureaucratic machine called U.S. Government. In July, Congress approved the Libyan Claims Resolution Act. This Act while it re-established a diplomatic relationship with Libya it also placed the State Department as the roadblock for families to go through to receive their financial compensation. The State Department granted a sum of $10 million to the estates of seven Americans, an amount roughly equal to the 2004 settlement (a far cry from $6 billion). They have also refused to forward Judge Kennedy's writings and the evidence presented in court to the Foreign Claims Settlement Commission in the Department of Justice, charged with handling the appeals for this Act.

The Jury
When did the State Department become the law, the judge and the jury? This major foreign policy decision passed without so much as a public hearing or announcement, according to Andrew Cochran of Counterterrorism Blog, who tracks these kinds of issue.

Experts in the know, had never seen this done. While I am no lawyer, I know that the stepping in of the State Department into a civil case matter sets a bad precedent because it gives other questionable state actors like Iran, Sudan and Zimbabwe equal access under the law, thus deflating the Anti-Terrorism Act of 1996.

Wrap Up
So let's see if I get this right. We can spend trillions of dollars in a country that has not committed one terrorist act against the United States. Yet we can buy off on the cheap known, proven and charged terrorist actors such as Libya. Hey, may be we should settle with Saudi Arabia for Osama bin Laden's actions for a few barrels of oil and $2 million per victim. A life simply isn't worth what it used to be. Thanks Bush.

This is just one more suicide that will not be vindicated under the Bush Administration.

The Afterw@rd

Becoming of Age

Today is a doozie for me. I've been preparing mentally, physically, spiritually for it for years. It was even one of the reasons why I even began this blog (smile).

Today I become the same age as my Mom when she completed.

Glad to see the day. I'm just working real hard to count my many blessings.

If this day is hard, wait 'til the anniversary date of her passing. I can hardly wait.

It's been over 30 years and it still hurts. But tomorrow is always better.

The Afterw@rd

A Suicide Per Day...

Yup. There you have it. To make sure we get it right, let's make a clear distinction between correlation and causality. We'll lay it out real clear. Living in or going to Las Vegas, Nevada doesn't cause suicide. Yet, a whole bunch of people who live there or end up visiting the Sin City are correlated to have a higher risk of suicide, 50 percent for residents and two-fold increase for visitors when compared to other visitor destination options. The city's current rate is one suicide per day, a rate that is twice as high as the rest of the country. This finding is also reinforced by another interesting correlation from the same study. City residents who leave the state to visit elsewhere are less at risk to complete suicide.

Who Dunnit?
The gambling doesn't do it, rather the want for a last chance sinful workout, unbeknown to your family and neighbors, is the correlation between suicide and Las Vegas.

Sinful Study
Dr. Matt Wray et. al. published the article and their findings in the current issue of Social Science and Medicine. With the support of his buddies from Harvard, "they looked at 40 million death records from across the country, spanning 30 years..." amounting to 600,000 suicides.

Any Beef?
Nope, not really. But I am curious. What if, as Morton Silverman of University of Chicago said, it's that people predisposed to suicide are some how drawn to Las Vegas? How large of an effect does predisposition have, if any? What role does religious faith play, if any? Are the suicide rates by race or by age proportional to what is found for the rest of the country? Once the fun was had, what if the emptiness for sinful living once had was just too painful to bear?

Dr. Thomas Joiner, author of Why People Die by Suicide, found in his research three factors that mark those most at risk of death by suicide: the feeling of being a burden on loved ones; the sense of isolation; and, the learned ability to hurt oneself. Maybe a visit to Vegas allows you to bat two out of three?

After the Fact
While people can focus on the numbers of those passed and on the preventive measures that can be instituted to prevent further suicides, I am a stand for those who live in the aftermath. If for every death an estimated 10 people are significantly affected, what of the 6,000,000 left-behind? What of them, indeed. Just another set of members in the silent majority.

The Afterw@rd

Quiet Power

President-elect Barack Obama officially announced today, on the anniversary of Japan's attack on Pearl Harbor, the selection of four-star General Eric K. Shinseki to head Veteran Affairs (VA). General Shinseki is a Japanese-American from Hawaii who courageously fought in Vietnam from which he came home seriously wounded and having lost most of a foot. He served and climbed through the Army ranks for the last 40 years, accomplishing many firsts as an Asian-American. As a member of the Joint Chiefs of Staff, he is notoriously known for getting the troop numbers right in Iraq, upsetting then-Secretary Rumsfeld's vision of a leaner, meaner armed force. A man of quiet power, integrity and strength, vindicated at last.

He is a man who has actually been at war and knows what it means to come back from the darkside. The Afterw@rd will be looking forward to following General Shinseki as he runs the VA, a bureaucratic behemoth that's been too busy being unaccountable for the rising tide of suicide and post-traumatic stress disorders among the ranks of soldiers returning home.

It's refreshing not to expect to hear any more about paper shredding or e-mail trails with instructions on how to cover-up or curb the diagnosis of soldiers and veterans with PTSD and/or suicidal idealation. A new chapter of hope beings for the VA. I trust General Shinseki will deliver in his own quiet way.

The Afterw@rd

The Happiness Contagion

I just turned off the TV, started to read today's newspaper. And guess what I found? Another happy article. There have been two of them in the news over the last few weeks. Funny. For a minute I thought I was in Bhutan, a country that takes happiness seriously enough to have a Gross National Happiness meter. The GNH measures the citizenry's collective psychological well-being and quality of life. Talk about political will. In the U.S. we just check whether we shop or not.

The Study, The Findings
So what makes this recent article on happiness so special? It's contagion. Dr. Nicholas Christakis of Harvard University and Professor James Fowler of UC San Diego produced a groundbreaking study published today in the British Medical Journal. They analyzed information, gathered from 1983 to 2003, on the happiness of 4,739 people and their social networks, including spouses, relatives, close friends, neighbors and co-workers, amounting to a social network of 50,000 links.

The findings, widely publicized on TV, radio and newspaper, indicate that your happiness may depend on how happy your friends' friends' friends are (folks, you read that right), even if you haven't even met them or know them at all. Happiness, literally, as a rub off effect. That's deep.

Hey the love doesn't last forever. According to the study, happiness has a two-year affect-effect span. The incident that makes your link's link's link happy must have happened over the last year to affect you and, in turn, its effect on you is only expected to last for a year. So tell your friends, to get happy slowly, spread out the wealth.

But how happy is happy? Well, as with all regression and time-series data, it's relative. Once you neutralize for the typical exogenous factors, like age, sex, occupation, etc., "...[a] friend living half a mile away was good for 42% percent bounce, but almost half as much for a friend who lived two miles away." We're talking about happiness that is relative to the average "happiness level" of those with like profiles. Similarly, "[a] next-door neighbor's joy increased one's chances of being happy by 34 percent, but a neighbor down the block had no effect." Yet, what I find most astonishing is the finding that a spouse's happiness had less impact (8%) than a next-door neighbor's (34%).

Where The Beef?
With limiting concessions, I would just love to say that I accept this study because Dr. Daniel Kahneman says I should (disclaimer: he taught a grad school class I took), but life is not that simple. If Dr. Christakis believes that taking cues from your own gender leads to a neighbor having a greater effect than you spouse, then what happends in gay and lesbian marriages? (Hey, I'm just asking!)

The good researchers found that the transmission of sadness was not as reliable as happiness. I'm simply not surprised by that finding. To me it reveals the tenuousness of these studied links and the weakness of the study. It is easier for people to ignore and emotionally disengage from someone who is suffering. In turn, the first thing that folks do when suffering from the disease of depression is to emotionally and socially retreat, thereby isolating themselves. Hence it makes sense that they would be on the fringe of the social network. Happy popular people are simply a self-fulfilling prophecy. While it would be great to just self-select "into circumstances that allow us to stay in a good mood" that is easier said than done for people suffering from depression or other mood disorders.

While further replication of this study is needed, now, more than ever we have a responsibility to do everything we can to be and feel our very best.

The Afterw@rd

Thanksgiving, Indeed

Dear Survivors,

I've got a way about me of keeping real busy when I don't want to think about things. I know I'm not alone. You feel me.

On days like this sometimes we focus on tradition so bad that we can't afford the time to show some love to those that make it happen. Maybe we do it intentionally, more likely than not subconsciously.

Kermit likes to say, "It isn't easy being green." Profound words for those who are blue.

To afford the time to think of who isn't present is just so there. Interlaced in the stuffing, mixed in the gravy, flowing through the juices of the turkey and in the smell of the cinnamon on the egg nog. It's in the eerie silence coming out of the kitchen or in front of the TV or wandering in halls or in the lack of drama that sometimes gets addictive. Comedic relief to reflect on after healing years later.

To those who have loved and lost, I pray for you comfort and enlightenment knowing that you are not alone. You share this experience with millions.

Let's take this moment to stand together, reflecting on those we have loved and lost. Be thankful, relieved, resolute, and forgiving of the time we did have together with those no longer with us. Above all today, be blessed and keep it moving. There's more life to live.

Happy Thanksgiving and Take Care,

The Afterw@rd

Death by MySpace

Wow. The times we live in. This landmark ruling came days after another young man prematurely ended his life through web camera (blog entry "Am I my brother's keeper") and the on-line viewership egged him on. In my eyes, it was a crime for the viewership too insensitive to take immediate action to finally get a dime and a clue 10 hours later. Here was another preventable death on society's hands.

When I was growing up, as a Socratic rhetoric for developing independent thought, I remember hearing "If so-so jumps off the bridge, will you?" A child's development is heavily determined by his or her environment and socialization. The ideal environment being some traditional version of "Leave it to Beaver"-kind of fairy tale la-la-land. When those factor's are lacking, it takes incredible inner strength to go against the grain, be your own person, able to move beyond the opinion of others. I've always been a bit proud of being the black sheep of my family.

And yet, for those young adults genetically predisposed to depression or other mood disorders, it's a wee bit more challenging. Like most youth, they must bear the burden of still trying to establish their own identity while being resilient in the face of other people's opinions. Yet, they may not always be fully in control of all of their emotions and reactions. This is more than just keeping one's hormones in check. This is how one reacts to life's small and large challenges, to external imposed control, to things that can seem sort of life and death at 13 years of age...a crush AND a pimple. It can cause one to cry, over eat, not sleep, be anxious, etc. exaggeratedly so. These emotions, when left unchecked through ignorance or negligence the symptoms over time do deteriorate to promiscuity, drug usage, etc. This is why employing preventive measures and conducting interventions are critical.

Unfortunately, most of society is often apathetic, not aware or sensitive to what is happening in the mind or to the mood of a 13 year old or anyone else undergoing internal turmoil. Clearly this adult woman, sure didn't. To her, the website was just a bad joke. The trial, a twisted freak of nature. Now, those who work in the field of mental health can feel somewhat vindicated since this is where a lack of awareness leads. Must we conquer this trial by trial? Website by website?

Without education and de-stigmatization of mood disorders...we have nothing. Let's be mindful and act preemptively.

The Afterw@rd

A Downward Spiral and a $7.8 Trillion Bailout

Today we had two unfortunate news breaks.

One from the Department of Commerce released a report that the annual rate of the Gross Domestic Product (GDP) decreased by 0.5 percent in the third quarter of 2008. In real terms, that's recession talk for we are still getting screwed.

The other news release came from the Federal Reserve and the Department of Treasury, unveiling an additional $800 billion bailout plan to assist struggling industries and get the government kick-started back again. Again? Mind you, that's on top of the $700 billion all ready passed by Congress.

Well, let's check the new total. This brings us to $7.8 trillion dollars (yes, that's half of the U.S. economy) spent on bailing out spa-visiting, England-fox hunting, jet plane flying folks with barely a dime going toward the root of the credit freeze problem: supremely bundled and leveraged, sub-prime mortgage holders.

To better understand the state of the U.S. economy and where all this money is coming from click here, else go to your nearest central bank to make some cash.

What does recession depression have to do with suicide, you may ask? When harsh economic figures can only be compared to those from the Great Depression, then the suicide rate becomes an economic indicator. A year after Hurricane Katrina suicide rates increased three-fold and 20 percent of the population suffered from post-traumatic stressed disorder. Since there does not seem to be an end to the downward spiraling economy in the near future should we just wait for the numbers of suicide victims to increase to say, "See, I told you so!"

This is when I down for a preemptive strike.

What to do? Do not judge others. Be vigilant for symptoms of depression. Talk to a mental health professional. Can't afford one? Talk to folks, friends, family, anyone with an understanding ear. If you can't find someone make a mental note of calling the Suicide Lifeline at a regular time. Hey, that's what they are there for. Use them.

According to professionals, there's a thin line between hurting yourself and hurting others. Going through recession depression is by no means an insular experience. However, there's truth to the saying that misery loves company. Don't wallow in the sadness, do things that make you happy, treat yourself well and gently. Give yourself permission to be selfish. Eat well. Exercise. Measure your progress. Every little step counts.

I know all this is easier said than done, but start somewhere. Even, if it's filing your toe nails. 90-year-old, Addie Polk (see blog title link) can tell you all about what it means to have a second chance at managing stress and acquiring better coping skills.

Let's give recession depression a run for its money.

The Afterw@rd

Turn Off Your TV! Be Happy...

I often laugh at social research studies that "prove" common sense social observations. It's like, "Those who see the sky as blue, tend to be happier than those who describe it as gray." It's like, I always knew...now I have PROOF.

Well, University of Maryland Professor Dr. John Robinson found this "new proof": Happier people watch less television than less happier people. They also socialize more, got to church (I imagine, regularly) and read the newspaper. The newspaper for crissake! I wonder does it matter if it's in print or on-line? Daily or weekly? And, does a computer screen (surfing the internet, dvd watching, etc.) count for TV time? Did the good doctor account for martial status, number of kids, hours worked, level of household responsibilities, etc.? No, really.

In short, Dr. Robinson just shows us that people in the study have a LIFE, a FAITH and, because they can converse, (OMG!) a SUPPORT NETWORK. You just have to love it. I know I'm in stitches. (Thank you to the 45,000 participants and your 35 years of hard activity recording work!)

Here comes the glitch, according to the New York Time,

"...the researchers could not tell whether unhappy people watch more television or whether being glued to the set is what makes people unhappy. "I don’t know that turning off the TV will make you more happy,” Dr. Robinson said.

Still, he said, the data show that people who spend the most time watching television are least happy in the long run."

Interesting.

Let me go out on a wild limb here...but I would venture to guess-estimate that there is also a high correlation between depression and the sample of the 45,000 participants who watch inordinate amounts of TV when compared to the "happy" study participants. I would even go further to say that most of these individuals are even less likely to be diagnosed for depression. I also venture to guess that there is no correlation by income status, education level, and family size. I won't even have to mention my concerns for home rearing, mild compulsive disorders, additive behavioral patterns, need for known safe spaces as a coping mechanism, loneliness, etc.

I won't even breath a word. Shhhh. Just in case, pass me the remote.

The Afterw@rd

National Survivor of Suicide Day: TODAY

A Day of Healing For Survivors of Suicide Loss

Today we celebrate the 10th Annual Survivor's of Suicide Day. Join with other survivors of suicide loss at a local site near you or register to watch the 90-minute program from your home computer from 1-2:30pm Eastern Time and take part in a free online chat immediately afterwards.

The program includes a blend of emotional support and information about resources for healing for survivors of suicide loss. Survivors and mental health professionals discuss their experiences and answer the questions that so many survivors face: Why did this happen? How do I cope? Click here to listen to a brief radio interview in which Joanne Harpel, Director of Survivor Initiatives, speaks about this annual event and the experience of losing someone to suicide.

To find a conference site nearest you, or to register to watch the webcast from home, visit www.afsp.org/survivorday. When you register to watch from home, you are automatically registered for the online chat afterwards.

We hope you'll share in this powerful day of support, information, and healing. Please feel free to pass this message on to anyone you think might be interested.

Take good care,
Joanne Harpel, AFSP Director of Survivor Initiatives
Bob Antonioni, Chair, AFSP National Survivor Council
www.afsp.org

Am I my brother's keeper?

Yesterday in the now infamous Broward County of Florida, a bipolar teenager struggling with depression contemplates suicide. The signs were all there. He wrote a note, told people his plan, spoke of his hopelessness and began to execute. A preventable death by medication overdose. All via a web camera (webcam).

Viewers response encouraged him, made fun of the situation and made fun of him.

They watched, as if suicide was a spectator sport.

I must not have gotten the memo, but can someone please tell me when did suicide become entertainment, like ribbed, for your viewing pleasure?

It took the collective 10 hours to get a clue and contact the police. The blood and life of that young man is now in the hands of every single person who viewed the thread and took part in it.

It is said that six people are "statistically affected" by each suicidal death. This incident is a game-changer to that statistical conclusion. The nature of the decentralized dissemination of this action and its ramification currently boggles my mind.

Some may call this an anomaly, I hope that is all it is. Else, we risk this being called a bad precedent.

We have to begin to ask ourselves, if faced with this situation "what would I do?". I pray it doesn't take you 10 minutes to take action.

The Afterw@rd

Choice in the Matter

"Life is ten percent what you make it and ninety percent how you take it." To me, this quote is too reactionary of a perspective without much meat, because life is not about easy livin'. Life and time have taught me that.

Bad things happen to everyone. It indeed is about how we choose to respond. We can lay down and sleep as life passes us by. When we awake we can choose to be sad, self-defeating, resentful, self-pitying. We choose.

Then here's the flip script. We can also choose to wake up and be about some thing progressive, be about change, be about life, be about making a difference for ourselves and those we love. Be about long-term, constructive, supportive, positive thought AND ACTION.

You can think about things all day long, but until you act, do, and achieve small incremental goals that's when we can look life in the face and know and rest in our knowing that we have made the most of the lemons we have been dealt.

It's our choice. Own it. Love it. Live it.

The Afterw@rd

"Live your life so that your children can tell their children that you not only stood for something wonderful- you acted upon it.
- Dan Zandra

A Dream Deferred...

Langston Hughes' poem A Dream Deferred always could get a rise out of me.

What happens to a dream deferred?

Does it dry up
like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore--
And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over--
like a syrupy sweet?

Maybe it just sags
like a heavy load.

Or does it explode?

My reading the poem always invoked the need for introspection. Was there a part of me unfulfilled? Have I not acted out on my wants and desires? Why could I not defy my environment and sow seeds of opportunities where none seemed to exists? This poem always served as my litmus test to self-realization. And yet, at it's core it again leaves me to ponder, what if the writer spoke on the unrealized dreams of someone with a mental illness?

It's one thing to have frustrated aspirations due to a lack of opportunity. Ghettos overflow with misguided talent. It's a whole other matter where one can't seem to untangle themselves to get from A to B. Where your follow-through challenges and coherence lies in your defective gene pool. It sort of sounds like being passed by a Nobel Prize committee despite one's obvious contribution to the end goal. So it's not enough to have done the work, you have to look the part.

Or else, what? Explode?

Dealing with 14 million...

We are approaching the holidays and the high season for when individuals consider suicide as an option. We must begin to ask ourselves now, "How will this upcoming year be different?" Dr. Philip Janicak estimates that 14 million people experience major depression annually. Of those individuals, half will be diagnosed with depression and of those treatment may benefit only 50 percent of that group. I've known way too many that fall within the first 7 million that do not even receive a diagnosis and think they can either sleep their condition off, handle it themselves or just accept themselves as being perpetually lazy. Many fail to make the connection that ninety percent of all people who die by suicide have a diagnosable psychiatric disorder at the time of their death.

The Politics of Will
It simply shocks me to my core to think that we are in the 21st century and no one really knows what is specifically happening in the brain to cause depression, and even sadder still that we still do not really know why psychiatric treatments work. The finding of psychiatric treatments is, as depicted in the linked Washington Post article, like clearing up (a soon to be extinct) analog signal by hitting the TV on the side; we don't know why it helps, but it sure allows us to have a clearer picture once again. If this is the case, then the real truth is that this is a matter of political will. It's simply not sexy enough to talk about mental health and get votes.

Should we have to wait for the 14 million to exponentially propagate and be self-reflective enough to embrace this issue so we can have a significant, representative voting block?

Until Then, Here's a Bump To Clear Your Head
Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS) is a growing noninvasive therapy technique being used to treat significant, chronic psychiatric and neurological disorders. It sounds pretty hi-tech but the roots of the technique can be found in good ole' 19th century electromagnetic theory, which explains the inter-relatedness between electricity and magnetism. In essence, the neurons or nerve cells in our brain (like joy, sadness or love) act as electrochemical agents that transmit chemical signals. If you have epilepsy or have fainted then you know how your brain is a powerful mass of electric currents. TMS generates a magnetic field that stimulates your neurons over time to alter or change how they function. Thereby, bringing back your magnetic personality (the pun was, totally, intended).

If TMS is something you might consider trying out for you or someone you love, it is recommended you check out NeuroStar's website, inform yourself on the matter, and as always, speak with an unbiased and un-compromised mental health professional to find out more.

The Afterw@rd

Disclaimer: The Afterw@rd's purpose in sharing about medical treatments is not to endorse, but rather inform of what's going on in this field of mental health and suicide. Should someone choose to pursue this option, they do so out of their own free will, and The Afterw@rd bears no liability.

Stop-Loss

On December 13, 2006,General Peter J. Schoomaker tried to tell President George W. Bush a thing or two about managing military troops. The President, by persisting in wanting a troop surge in Iraq, "[was] stressing the force...these kids just see deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan for the infinite future." Unfortunately, Gen. Schoomaker is just a man who has seen war and knows what it does to people.

This goes beyond wanting to deliver a blockbuster hit. A President that knows his own power will exercise it, absolutely. The irony of the tale is that the surge really didn't make a bit of difference on the ground; it has just served as cotton for the political spin-doctors working the Presidential campaigns.

So what are the ramifications?

We are left to observe the saddest competition of all: how the 2008 suicide rate among soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan outpaces 2007 and 2003 and the post-Vietnam rate.

Ain't it fun to watch?

The fact of the matter is that these poor soldiers are just seen as collateral damage. Expendable to all but their families and those they have left behind.

In this Presidential election we have to ask ourselves, what does success look like and what does it cost us? It's much more than $10 billion per month.

It's time to end the stop-loss so we can stop the loss of soldiers to suicide.

The Afterw@rd

No Day in Court

I'm not here to debate whether Bruce Ivins, a research scientist and leading suspect of the 2001 anthrax attacks, was guilty or not. However, I do believe he should have had his day in court. On July 29, 2008, I imagine Ivins felt himself and his career beyond repair: humiliated, alienated, annihilated, and crouched upon. So much so, that he chose to take his life at a Frederick, MD hospital on that day rather than face his accusers in court. Ivins opted for a permanent solution to a temporary problem.

The irony of the matter came out in news tidbits over the last few days. The "evidence" gathered against him was largely circumstantial. Ivins was not the only person with access to the deadly anthrax spores. The science tracing the anthrax strain to the lab was still uncertain; the science simply does not incite the comfort that a fingerprint test or DNA test offers to a unique source. It would have been an "interesting case for debate," so say the subject expert pundits.

Interesting? Hello!? It seems like there is no justice or accountability for character assassination in today's news media. It must pay the bills and feed the news frenzy. Granted, in the news, there's not much room for sadness, remorse, or forgiveness.

Now the question stands what of his family and loved ones? What of those left behind? His family, church home, community, etc.? If there is one thing I've learned from experience is that when someone dies by suicide, everyone is affected whether you think you are or not. Everyone.

The Afterw@rd

Out of the Darkness

So here I am again facing my fears.

Like last year, my indecisiveness confounded me on whether to join in The Overnight walk, a 20-mile walk overnight which benefits the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. For the first time in 30 years I swallowed my pride and let folks know a painful issue in my life: the death of family members to suicide. Why should I have to remind folks the embarrassing tale that everything is not so perfect in my perfectly constructed little world?

Then life happens. The news happens. The reason for being happens. It rudely awakens me to remind me that it's not about me. It's about you, greater than anything I may be confronting.

Two days ago, a man unable to bear the mental weight of living in post-Katrina Louisiana, snaps, and ends up getting shot by police in a stand off because he can't bear to leave his FEMA trailer. A week ago, a front page news story appears in the Washington Post stating that the suicide rate among soldiers returning from Iraq and Afghanistan is at an all time high over the last two decades.

Over the last month, the "in your face" reasons never seemed to end.

I'll be in New York City tomorrow. Walking. For you. Into the light.